Happy Friday the 13th
Just cause I’m home on my own,
by my own choice btw and since I knew I’d feel a bit lonely and stuff I’m gonna write a blog..
Renate is out with Steven and his mates, Maggie is out with her friends and Leida have her boyfriend over, So I am sat in my room watching Driving Lesson, starring Rupert Grint. I am quite enjoying it so far.
Renate’s mum sent a parcel and it arrived yd, so we got some salty liqurice and stuff, i’ve already had a taster, or 3:P
I know I’m baaaaad, it’s not like I should eat sweets:P
not doing my any good, except for tasting lovely. it gives me spots, bad skin and it is definitely not going to make me any thinner.
which leads me onto a more negative subject, my self confidence.
I think one of the main reasons it is so low is the fact that I’m still single.. almost 24 and still single, it sucks..
I know this is cliche, but I’m so sick of being single, I’ve had 2 somewhat real releationships, together they lasted about 6months.. so I’ve been single for 23 years and almost 2 months of my life. something that makes me feel like somewhat of a failure, am I really that unattractive? unappealing? just this last month 4 of my friends have hooked up, (which tbh I am quite happy about, there’s nothing I like more than seeing my friends being happy, so it isn’t meant as a guilttrip. Especially my girl Renate, she deserves happiness more than anyone)
But I’m starting to feel like the last single girl (I know there’s more of us).. almost a little like Drew Barrymore in never been kissed. Except for the kissed part.
and yes i know i’ll find someone and all that swada..
(don’t think that’s an english word)
but i’m loosing faith here.. seriously.. what’s the point? life isn’t always happy endings like the movies.
I wouldn’t mind getting my happy ending though..
Honestly, usually I don’t mind being single.. just some days.. it gets to you
maybe I should’ve gone out with Renate and them anyway, it would’ve saved me from these stupid thoughts, cause I’m pretty sure I will be told I’m wrong about myself..
But you all have days like this as far as I know?
I’m just feeling really unattractive and unwanted sometimes..
It’s not like I would’ve had time for a relationship anyway, Because as you’ve seen earlier on my blog, I’m a busy girl till christmas, and I should really rather do some revising for my test rather than blogging about my sad, pathetic thoughts and watching Rupert Grint play someone else than Ron Weasley..
on the positive side, Renate got this Guestlist thing, where we pay £5 to see Elliot Minor tomorrow in bham, which would cool, since we haven’t seen them in over a year! And we’re going christmas shopping in bham during the day tomorrow.
(post me wishes if you feel like you’ve earned a pressie from me 😉 hehe )
That is unless my darling best friend isn’t too hungover from tonight, but I think she’ll be fine, even if the lads trick her into drinking doubles:P
so tomorrow I’ll be all happy and cheery again I reckon. This is just what being alone does to me:P