Last night we surprised our lovely housemate at midnight, with birthday cake and sparkling rose wine!
She was so surprised and happy, mission accomplished:)
We love our Maggie, and she deserved something special, so we gave her something special:D
Then I couldn’t sleep for about two hours, for no reason at all really.
I guess I am having a good bad day, is that possible?
It’s like nothing’s really wrong, it’s just the motivation and drive that is missing?
I have a ton of uniwork today, and I am seriously freaking out about it a little, but I’ve been sat here at the library for quite a while and tbh, I haven’t done much other than watch an episode of Criminal Minds, started writing a description of University of Wolverhampton for Ansa and then stared at my books a little bit.
It makes me feel useless and stupid, because I want to be ahead on this, I want to finish my essay early so I can focus on other things, important things. but nothing feels important enough you know.
I have all these thoughts in my head, I read about TESOL teacher education, and it does seem very interesting, except to do the postgrad one you need a 2:1 degree, i’ll be lucky to even get a 2:2.
I keep thinking about what is gonna happen next year, will I find a job? or will I continue down the path of failure?
don’t get me wrong, I don’t regret going abroad or anything, that’s the best choice i’ve made in my entire life.
I just regret doing this.. *sighs*
I worry a lot, because it will come to me.. I also worry about being alone.. all the time..
because often even when I’m not alone, I feel so small, so insignificant, unwanted even at times..
I know for most parts it isn’t even true, but I still think about it..
yeh good day/bad day..
at least I get to have “a date” with my best friend later, while her boyfriend is home being fed, we will feed ourselves too..
Now I’m gonna make a serious attempt at doing some work so that the bad part of today will become good and there’ll be no bad day at all..
(yeah cause that made sense)